The best part about it, is that I'm HAPPY

In the end, that's all that really matters.  I can't believe I'm saying this but I truely love my stepdad for his wisdom.  Sometimes it takes a real beatdown for things to sink in haha.  Let's just say I know a lot more than I did yesterday, the day before that, but a lot less today compared to what I'll know tomorrow.

It's a really weird place where my heart is right now.  It's kinda like being in some type of dream state, where if I stay asleep or wake up I wouldn't mind it either way.  People live on, people choose their own ways to live on.  For me, it's a secret haha.  I enjoy the training which gets my mind off of thinking too much, I enjoy thinking because it allows me to reflect upon what I need to do.  There really isn't a right or wrong to the choices I've got, it's just "my" choice, and so I feel good about that. 

Am I confusing you? I hope so hahaha...

"I understand everything now, and even if I don't get exactly what I want, it's ok because I've become a better person than I once was."

Agito